Monday, October 3, 2011
MS - the gift
When I was diagnosed I was told not to be afraid, MS is a gift, it helps people slow down and enjoy life more. Since then I have also read in M.S. books and websites that people enjoy slowing down and getting a chance to appreciate people more and noticing things in life they used to whiz past not taking the time to enjoy. M.S. as a gift.
My initial internal response, MMPH. : (
I lost so much, my career as a massage therapist, my income, all my savings, my relationship and now physically unable to go to school and stay awake long enough to read my homework and study.
So in getting used to my diagnosis and trying to find any OK-ness I could with this extreme life change, I took it to the bathroom mirror and used my ham of resilience acting. I smiled real big, tried to make it look authentic, deep breath, relax, smile again, bigger, see my eyes sparkle with my inner light, feel happiness and say so proudly and honored, “I have M.S. It's a gift. I am so lucky, my life is great.” Big smile. Say it again, then again, SMILE, feel the happiness, SMILE like it's the best news in the world, like I'm saying, “I got published for a lot of money, I have a loving partner, my life is great!”
I had to practice admitting and getting used to saying, “I have M.S.” It was so difficult to say at first but my smile acting did help to say it. SMILE. “I have M.S.” SMILE.
I do accept it now and am proud. Life is so much better with acceptance.